Fasting sucks! Actually, it's not that bad, but it's really strange. I thought this was an easy way out, the easiest way to fast, I can pretty much eat what I want all day as long as it's whole and healthy and today instead of the chili again(which was delicious by the way) I thought I would make my very favourite Honey Baked Lentils. I discovered this dish at the Mothering Magazine forums where I am a moderator. One of my co-moderators created it and it's one of the favourites and well known throughout the community.
Now, remember my post about sugar addiction? Well several days before the fast I decided to give up sugar. So my evenings were consumed with the desire for a sweet treat however now, here I sit craving for honey-baked lentils. I haven't eaten since 5:30 pm, early as sunset wasn't until 6:32pm today. But the kids had soccer so what do you do? It's after 10pm and under normal circumstances I would have eaten a load of snacks by now. I'll get through. I'm having a nice cup of my usual bedtime tea.
On the spiritual side of things I did some yoga this morning. I use the Yogamazing podcasts that you can get free at the iTunes store and did about 20 minutes of a cleansing flow. It was really nice however my computer froze near the end so it sort of interrupted the final part however it was beautiful. I walked twice, the first time I listened to an audiobook as I walked and the second time I made sure I was fully engaged with the children. We walked to soccer and that was a practice in patience.
Patience. Yes, that seems to be a quality I'm lacking these past few days. I am noticing some irritability. The problem with being an emotional eater and using food as a crutch is that when you no longer have the crutch you have to deal with the emotions. That's why I feel it's imperative that any changes in diet should be accompanied by a change in all aspects of life. If you are happier and joyful in other ways you will not need to find happiness and joy in a cookie(or a bag of cookes, because one cookie doesn't do the damage, it's the accumulation of years of cookies).
As I go along, five more days of this practice in discipline and mindfulness, I'm hoping that this will be a catalyst to further growth in all areas, including diminishing the negative thoughts about food that I've been entrenched in all these years.
Namaste
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When a person does something, like diet, hidden motivations exist behind. They go unnoticed or unacknowledged until a person is read to delve into this. As negative energy (i.e., discomfort, restlessness and self-questioning) surface, the mind is getting closer to recognizing underlying reasons for an action like fasting. To meditate on the reasons behind an action helps a person get to know the self on new levels. Self-image and lack of self-acceptance often come into play. This is a key point. Negative energy captures your attention to empower you to grow. Its your choice what to do with that you are given.
I am unsure as to your meaning?
Breeze
My reasons for fasting were to explore the feelings of deprivation that accompanies dieting...an exploration in the deprivation that leads to dietary failure. Further to that, to take time, make space, for further meditation and study. Underlying reasons, I haven't discovered any yet but that may be because of the preparations I made, the state of mind that I placed myself in before beginning the fast.
I don't diet, which is why I started this blog. I don't weigh, however my relationship with food is tainted by cultural negative messages. I am exploring ways to figure out what they are and then to move past them, with new messages. I'm working with hypnosis, meditation, energy work, spiritual work.
Just some background, that may not be obvious from the past few posts.
namaste
Breeze