I've had a pretty stressful week but I've been feeling pretty normalised in my eating patterns. Something has clicked into place. So today I decided as a treat to make chocolate chip cookies. I knew I was not going to binge on them. I feel healthier and able to make sensible choices without deprivation.

When the cookies were done I sat and had a glass of milk and two of the cookies. Immediately I began to feel funny. I was shaky and had this weird cloudiness come over me. It passed after a few moments. I haven't been eating refined sugar lately and I guess my body was shocked by it.

Now the thing is, I've had this happen before. I'm sure it's the adult equivalent of the sugar-rush except it feels creepy to one who likes to have control over herself. A while later I went and had one more. Same thing, that rushy/shaky feeling yet again. I don't have this happen when I'm eating sugar regularly, I think we either get used to the feeling so it's not a shock or we're numbed by the cloudiness and I don't notice.

Either way, no more cookies for me. I don't like the feeling. The cookies are not that good(wow, did I actually say that?).

Now to address the issue of stress. It's been a week of challenges. My wonderful aunt has been diagnosed with pretty serious cancer. Originally it was thought to be just in her colon but it's been found in both lungs, on her liver and in the lymph nodes. She will have quite a battle to fight. I've been walking around feeling helpless and then today I decide enough of that, if I can't help her I'll help someone else. So I set up a team for the cancer Relay Walk for Life and I've signed up 7 of our family members to walk with me on June 12. Instead of moping and eating my way through, I'm being proactive and I'm going to work my way through it. This will help my family who can't be there for her, get together for a good cause and help each other while raising awareness and money.

Affirmation: I will find a way to direct my energy into something positive that helps instead of burying my emotions under a pile of crappy food and sugar. A healthy me can better serve the world.

Namaste

Yesterday I spoke of Yoga. Shortly after I posted I came across some free Yoga podcasts. You can find them at Yogamazing. Just a short while ago I did the beginner show and it was amazing. I have just enough room here in my office to practice. What a gift.

A second gift has been presented to me. The reward of losing some weight. As I go along the journey, looking for signs that I'm finally on the right track, I see suddenly that things are a bit looser. I'm trimmer and slimmer and stronger. I don't weigh with a scale and I have been weighing my success differently this time. I've been measuring it in steps taken rather than pounds lost. I've given myself over to a process that requires complete trust. I am working by instinct, knowing that if it feels right it likely is right.

So check out Yogamazing. Or if that doesn't interest you try the Couch to 5K program or the 100 push ups challenge or the any other number of free gifts available to you on the internet if you are inspired to follow your own path towards optimal health and well being. And of course walking is always free, if the weather cooperates enjoy the gifts mother nature has for you! Please check my sidebar for links to all the free help I've discovered. And if you have suggestions for something to add to this list I'd be happy to add it as well.

I just had to return to edit the post. The gifts keep coming. If you download podcasts from Yogamazing you can then go to www.audible.com/yogamazin and download a free audiobook! I just did. The Biology of Belief by Dr. Bruce Lipton. I've spent a lot of time listening to him speak, interviews he has done but I never actually ever read the entire book. Now I will listen to for free. The gifts keep coming when you look for them!

Affirmation: I am grateful for all of the gifts the universe is sending me to ensure my success on my journey to optimal wellness. I trust completely that everything I need for my journey will be provided.


Namaste

Last night I had a yoga class. This morning I did sun salutations. It's an amazing practice. During yoga we had a short discussion about holistic medicine vs. western medicine which treats disease and focuses on one aspect without taking into consideration the whole person.

The example was a study of Vitamin D. It said that children born in September tended to have stronger bones because their mothers often had more natural vitamin d having gone through summer and gotten vitamin D from the sun. This makes sense, unless you use sunscreen which then blocks the vitamin D. The holistic approach would be to make sure that everybody has a way of achieving the benefits of the sun no matter what time of year. The western way would be to recommend supplementation of the diet with vitamin D for everybody across the board although some might not necessarily need it. And to use sunscreen to block the sun's rays and then add artificial vitamin D.

I'm all about the holistic approach. I believe all systems of the body work in coordination with the others and that all elements of the person, mind, body and spirit also work with each other and to maintain a balance of these aspects of a person, if we are working to fix something, everything must be considered.

I consider weight loss to be a perfect example of where the focus is on one thing, the body. But a person who is out of balance in one area is also likely out of balance in another. I know that most people who are feeling the emotional results of an unhealthy body need to focus on the emotional aspects at the same time they focus on the physical. Fixing the physical will not fix the emotional because often it's the other way around, the emotional aspect is the cause and the physical issues are a manifestation of spiritual and emotional imbalance.

So the fix is to allign yourself so that you are working on all of the aspects of you at the same time. I'm doing yoga for the physical, mental and spiritual aspects of the practice. I'm looking for a sport to participate in because my spirit enjoys physical play. I like to run for meditative reasons as well as physical. Everything is connected.

So to go into a weight loss program where the focus is almost entirely physical, eat less, move more(good advice yet they don't stand alone) is not likely to work. There needs to be a complete holistic approach that shifts the paradigm from working on a specific problem to working on the whole human.

Affirmation: I am a whole person. My body needs strengthening as does my mind and spirit. As I work on all three together I feel all things balancing and trust that the healthy coordination of all of the systems and aspects of me will be the best approach to my imbalanced eating.

For free yoga classes join Yoga Today

Namaste

We have been set up. I'm not sure if it's deliberate or not but we've been set up to plunk our hard earned money down for a product that has never delivered!

Today I was reading a blog. A woman had gained a little bit of weight, I'm going to say 1 pound. A small amount. She was so negative towards herself it hurt me. She had failed. She was miserable. I was devastated for her. Not because she had gained a pound but because she measured her worth on her ability to gain or lose that bit of weight.

Here is the set up. We've been told for a long time now that gaining weight is bad. It's a meme that has been planted in our mind, something that isn't necessarily true, but we've been told again and again, so many times about the epidemic of obesity and trained with the language of negativity that being overweight even the slightest is a failure. That was part one of the set up.

Part two was when they said they could help you take it off. You just had to send them billions of dollars and you'd be perfect. Wrong again. They haven't taken anything off you except some temporary pounds and a whole lot of cash.

And the third part of the set up was when they convinced you that you couldn't do it yourself. Yes you can. In fact who else is going to do it for you?

We have not failed, we've been failed!

I have a friend who has lost a whole pile of weight and guess what, no diet industry. She does belong to a non-profit support group but she's worked her behind off(literally she'd say) to lose the weight and she's fit and healthy and doing well. A complete success. But the diet industry did nothing, she did the legwork all herself. She decided. She did the work. She succeeded.

I'm also pretty sure she didn't lose it by having a failure mindset. I'm sure she also has worked a lot on her relationship with food, It's likely she will be maintaining the lifestyle she's adopted that has led to her success for good. I think she's one of the 5%.

Long term I feel the best bet to losing weight is by gaining a healthy food relationship. The key to being in optimal health is to avoid the diet industry, exercise, eat right, address your disordered eating honestly and be patient with yourself.

Set a goal but don't let it be a number on the scale. I've set my goal, it's to have a healthy fit body and even more importantly eat for the right reasons. I haven't placed a time line on my goal. I just know it's there and moment by moment I'm addressing the issues that placed me here in the first place.

I won't be set up again.
Affirmation: I feel the delight that will come when I have a healthy fit body and a healthy fit mind. I see evidence daily that I can do it by reprogramming the memes that have infiltrated my belief system but that bear no truth under further investigation.

Namaste

We have had a lot of rain in the past two days but this morning dawns bright and sunny and warm. As I pulled out of my driveway to drive my daughter to school I couldn't help but be amazed at the miracle that has happened! The grass is a rich green suddenly, in two days, it has transformed from a drab beige carpet with a few green sprinkles to full blown green shag. The leaves on the trees suddenly have burst open and are starting to fill up the gaps between the grey branches to make shelter for the birds that are chirping loudly in the morning outside my bedroom window.

I've made some observations over the years about our relationship to water. I have been to many diet support groups and what seems overwhelmingly common is that something has happened culturally to interfere with our taste for water. We don't "like" it. Yet, like the green grass that needs it to spring forth from dormancy, water is our very life source.

Yesterday on the radio there was a discussion on diet and a very good point was made by the commentators. We apparently get 90% more calories from liquid sources than we did 50 years ago. Back then orange juice was a weekend morning treat and milk was only taken with meals, not as a daily thirst quencher. But then along came sugared flavours for water(Kool aid, Tang etc.), fun yes, but absolutely devastating to the teeth of the children who consumed them and their weight as well. From that there was a progression from the occasional pop as a treat to people consuming soda pop in place of water. When people decided to let go of sugary drinks they switched to "diet" soda. All of this resulted in a preference to have much of our water flavoured and/or bubbly or both. Or we justify juice because it has vitamins but to excess it's just as devastating. It has interfered with our taste for water and interfered with our health.

The radio show also made the point that liquid calories do not satisfy the hunger as solid food does so you become hungrier faster. So it's a double whammy, less pure water, diminished preference for pure, clear water, and more calories.

I have almost completely switched to pure water. I do drink a carbonated plain water occasionally with slices of lime for a treat, coffee in the morning and I also occasionally will have orange juice or milk(once or twice a month). I haven't given up anything but what I'm regaining is a taste for water again.

I think it's imperative to work at regaining the love for the taste of pure clear water. I think we need to attach positivity to it again and rewrite the messages that are symbolic of our preference for the sugary tasting drinks and apply them to our life source, water!

I wonder how many of us would throw cola on our front lawn to make it grow? I think we'd be concerned the acid would burn the grass, yet we throw this kind of thing into our bodies regularly.

Start enjoying water daily. Don't suffer through, make it a habit, a delicious habit. Talk yourself into it, identify yourself as a water lover and make it true!

Affirmation: I love to drink pure, clear, life-giving water. It is necessary and good and I appreciate every drop in my mind as my body appreciates every pure droplet it needs to keep me alive and well.
Namaste

On days like today it's best to just let things slide. In fact it's nice to let things go sometimes. My oldest daughter came home with a pile of laundry, her homework for school and to pick up her computer desk that has been stored in the basement. It was completely crazy. Without boring you with details let's just say that this is the first time I've been sitting today. My husband is gone and all four daughters spent most of the afternoon working on homework and laundry. Then there was dinner and wash up and bathtime for little ones etc. Wait, I said I wouldn't bore you. Of course I could have made things easy on myself if I hadn't collected all the garbage and put it out since garbage day isn't tomorrow morning, it's the next. Yep, I'm so tired I'm an over acheiver!

I have no idea what I ate today. I don't think it was a total bust however there was no exercise particularly and nothing soul-saving, no meditation, no walk, no alone time, nothing to fill me up, and I'm feeling zapped.

Tonight I will lay in bed and listen to the hypnosis Mp3 and fall asleep exhausted. I hope tomorrow will provide a little more balance. I will be down to one child for a day and that makes things quieter around here.

So there is no affirmation today, just a reminder to take care of myself tomorrow. I have a better topic tomorrow, I'm sure inspiration will come after a good nights sleep.

Namaste

Our bodies have an intricate balance of fluids flowing in our bloodstreams and other systems and one of the key elements to this balance is the hormone interplay. Women, in particular, have a cycle that plays havoc with the ability to have a sense of control. I've know this is the week to watch for yet, somehow, when I found myself wandering around the house, looking for something baked to put into my body I didn't make the connection between what I wanted and the impending start of my menses.

I know what I wanted. I wanted something sweet. Baked. I tried chocolate, didn't do it. I tried popcorn, still not it. I would have had a couple of cookies and called it quits however I had nothing in the house. I finally last night, said out loud to my husband, as I was making my nightly tea, "I really want a cookie" and he said "oh, I have some chocolate chip cookies and some cinnamon buns in the truck". OK, sweetheart,love of my life, soul-mate, man of my dreams, a little advice, I'm pmsing here, please don't hold back the cookies! So he(quickly) brought them in, and I had one cookie and two cinnamon buns(tiny ones, don't panic!) and that was it. Craving satisfied. The remaining cinnamon rolls were left for the children and I could not be bothered this morning.

I know from experience that the sugar cravings will subside after today for another three or four weeks and I also know it's better to have exactly what you want, once you've identified it, than to try to satisfy it with other things. They key is to indulge, not overindulge in the treats. In trying to satisfy my cravings I sampled ice cream, smarties, cheese and crackers, popcorn, cheese and crackers again and then eventually, a cup of tea and the sweets I wanted all along satisfied me.

Sometimes it's better to give yourself permission to eat a little of what you really want. I think that depriving yourself completely of the treats, labelling things bad or good, is detrimental to your overall attitude and that impacts your overall health.

Another thought. We are all born with counter will. Counter will is that thing that children have, you see it in 3 year olds a lot, where they will say and do the opposite of what you tell them. Well it doesn't go anywhere. How many of us like to be told what to do? I don't, I've got a well-honed counter will going on. It's immediate. I will do the most kind, wonderful, generous things for people who ask. Tell me to do something and my first instinct is to do the opposite. There is something to be said for presentation.

The same goes for the messages we send ourselves. "Don't eat cookies" immediately triggers counter will. The thought that follows is "I want cookies and I'll do whatever I want".

Yesterday's challenge wasn't counter will for me necessarily, I just didn't have cookies in the house. But often it is and I thought it worth mentioning. In order to avoid the pitfall of counter will, don't send yourself the shouldn't messages regarding food. Give yourself permission to eat whatever you want whenever you want and then find tools to change what you want and when you want it.

So what a switch! What a paradigm shift! In order to set myself up for success to lose weight, I need to have cookies in the house. I just need to only eat them when necessary. I actually practiced that a lot last week. I baked a batch of cookies and the jar was only emptied two days ago. Today I'm baking more. And the truth is, I did eat one occasionally, but not every day, and only one or two. They didn't call to me as the have in the past.

Affirmation: I am learning new, kinder, gentler, accepting messages that allow me to make decisions about food in a normal natural way, accepting that the nature of my body is fluid and that I will have fluctuations in the desire for different foods on different days and I'm learning to be in tune with them.

Namaste

Now that I seem to have cravings and compulsive eating coming under control it's time to start thinking about what I'm eating. I am not going to weigh, measure or limit myself however I do think I am doing myself a huge injustice if I don't take this opportunity to use some common knowledge to take advantage of this new information that seems to be coming to me.

First of all, I am drinking a lot of water. I am thirsty a lot and I'm going with that. I'm not sure if I'm thirstier than I ever was or if I used to mistake some of my thirst for hunger. Either way, it's water I want now and that's what I'm giving my body.

Diet is everything. What you put into your body is very important. I believe, personally, because it makes sense to me, that optimum nutrition comes from eating food as close to the source state as possible. Food at its source is raw. I think that most of our diet should consist of raw foods. Nuts, vegetables, fruit, anything that has not been processed in any way should make up the bulk of our diet. It is my goal to eat raw food with every meal and snack. Salad at lunch and dinner and fruit with snacks is an easy and culturally normal way to go. Alternatives include green smoothies and cold, uncooked soups. There are lots of raw foods that find its place in a diet that is mostly raw.

The most basic processed foods are those that are cooked. I will eat cooked foods. I have in the past tried to eat raw but the feelings of deprivation were too much and it's not natural to me. When I cook it will be local green vegetables, soups, casseroles and such.

Other processed foods, pasta, cereals, baked goods will drop to the bottom of the list, even those without added preservative to avoid excess refined flour and sugar. Occasional indulgences are fine but I don't need this every day. But occasionally I want some sweets and I'll have some. I will have ice cream on a hot day if I wish. I won't deprive myself again of things I love.

Junk food has to be very rare. I've never been a big junk food junky. I am very proud that the one junk food treat I over indulged in for years, diet pop, has been permanently removed from my diet for the past 6 months. That is proof right there you can do anything you want if you want it bad enough and then do it.

So it's time to clean it all up now. I think I have a good basic set of tools and with some expert shopping, some prioritizing, I will see great changes in the immediate future.

Affirmation: One day at a time, one moment at a time I am seeing success in my attitude towards food. I require, I deserve the best for my body and I am gaining the tools required to provide this to myself.


Namaste

I am excited! Today the sun is shining. We've had rain for many days and I have had no physical exercise at all. I've been chomping at the bit. My main exercise is walking and I don't own a treadmill, something to be remedied next fall, however for now it's outside. I walk with my children in a double jogging stroller and I run every other day. I have started the couch to 5k program again and then the weather got nasty setting me back. I've seen lots of runners out in all sorts of nastiness but they've got great gear. Me, I don't have a good running jacket or even a hat that fits. I have a very large head! So it is my intention to invest in a treadmill next year so I don't have to start over yet again in the spring.

Today I will walk for at least an hour. It's quite a workout with the two kids, the dog and even the cat in the wagon sometimes. We're a funny sight.

I have not listened to the hypnosis download for a few days but I'm not noticing that I'm slipping back into terrible habits. My jeans feel a bit loose but that's all I have to go on and I'm trying not to obsess too much on that part of it. I have to trust that all will be as it should be. It's still frustrating not to fit my clothes yet.

I got in bed yet and tried to think of an affirmation for the night to sleep on but I couldn't come up with words. All I remember was a feeling of well being and optimism at the thought of being fit and slim and at peace with food and that feeling drifted me off to sleep. So now, today it's easy to come up with the affirmation.

Affirmation: I feel at peace in the knowledge that I am on my way to health, well being and fitness.

And before I go, check this out! Hypnotransformations is having a giveaway to celebrate her 200th Etsy sale! It's easy to enter and you could win your own hypnosis weightloss download or another if you prefer!

Namaste

What I am noticing lately is that I'm not noticing things as much. Something has definitely shifted in that other than deliberately noticing things to write here I'm not consumed by the idea of what I will be eating or not eating from one moment to the next.

Last night we visited family for dinner. I'm vegetarian so I filled my plate with the potatoes, salad, carrots and let me tell you that our aunt is such a great cook that there was no deprivation at all. How can anyone make carrots taste that good? After dinner of course the usual desserts came forward, pound cake(she's an incredible baker as well), biscotti, light as a feather oatmeal cookies and Ben and Jerry's Half-Baked ice cream. I sampled and drank tea and chatted without a thought about the dessert or calories or fat or portion etc. In fact I didn't think about it at all until I sat down to write this and couldn't think of anything I'd noticed yesterday.

So I've noticed that suddenly the obsession is gone and now I know what freedom feels like. Imagine you trust 100% that you will eat exactly the right amount of food and not have to give it a second thought. Can you imagine what that feels like? Many of us can't, we've been caught up for so long in the obsession over weight, diet, calories, etc. I am losing weight and gaining freedom and it feels wonderful.

Last night I did my nightly affirmations as I fell asleep. They are becoming habit now. I seem to be able to handle my emotions a little better with a calming tea instead of food and this has helped tremendously. I'm always thirsty for water and that's always nearby as well. Still positive, still trusting, still confident in this process, that's how I feel today.

Affirmation: I trust that I will gain a normal relationship with food and throw off the burden of the diet industry's lies.

A comment on my last post got me thinking about what I"m trying to do here with this blog. In order to do that I have to give a little bit of the history of my background with food and how my attitudes towards it is(was)screwed up.

In all my dealings with the diet industry, all of the diets I have tried, one important part, the most important element I think, that has been missing is the "why" we overeat element. I am sure the reasons we overeat are wide and varied however I think for a lot of us we have some sort of disordered eating. We don't eat for the normal physiological reasons of hunger but for many other reasons. We grew up in a household that ate a lot, we grew up with parents who forced us to clean our plate, we have been on multiple diets to lose weight that set in motion a deprivation feeling that caused us to want to over eat and then the failure of the diet causes us to go into a negative spin and we go "What the hell" and eat again. I guess if any and all of this is your pattern of eating then this applies to you. It applies to me. The message we've accepted all our lives as the one that are true about diet and weight are not true at all and I'm going in a completely different direction here, away from anything status quo.

I do want to point out that I'm trying to problem solve this issue for myself. Losing weight is secondary to gaining back what I've lost over the years, a healthy attitude about food and about my body.

If you are overweight and you have a healthy relationship with food and you are well physically then you don't need me, this blog or any other weight loss advice. There is nothing wrong with being a bigger person in size in and of itself. It's much more important to be in touch with the person you are than the size you are. My body will always have fat on it. It should. It's supposed to as a woman's body. My goal is to fix my relationship to food. Losing weight will happen but that's secondary and irrelevant in many ways.

As a secondary benefit of approaching this from the aspect of trying to fix my disordered eating I've discovered I don't care so much if I actually lose weight. It's nice to fit in my clothes, I'm doing healthy things like Yoga and walking and all of that is beneficial to my health and well-being. I'm still confident I will lose weight, it's just not the main focus of my life anymore.

So, I'm trying to take the focus off the actual food and focus on the behaviour if that makes sense.

I'm not worried about sugar addiction or white flour or the intricate balance of carbohydrate, protein, vitamins etc. because common sense tells me that the closer a food is to its natural state the healthier it is. I eat a lot of raw food, I eat some cooked food, usually unprocessed except for the cooking and occasional refined food(flour and sugar. I rarely eat chemicals having given up artificial sweeteners quite a while ago after coming to the conclusion that moderate sugar intake was a better choice. For me that's an ideal balance and leaves deprivation out of the equation. I can eat anything I want whenever I want. I'm just trying to change what I want.

This message, this affirmation below is likely the biggest step I've taken in this journey to date.

Affirmation: I can eat whatever I want, whenever I want and I trust that the new messages in my subconscious will limit me so that the amount I want no longer negatively impacts my health.

Namaste

There was a movie called Death Becomes Her that was out a few years back that starred Meryl Streep, Goldie Hawn, Isabella Rossellini and Bruce Willis. In the movie Meryl Streep drinks a potion and after she has finished the bottle the Isabella Rossellini character who gives it to her says "And now a warning" to which Meryl Streep replies"Now a warning?" Well, I feel a bit like Meryl Streep today, without the academy awards and the large bank account.

I've been using the hypnosis download and I love it. I know it's working, I see signs. I just don't spend every waking moment thinking about food or what I'm going to eat, I have a very laid back attitude and except for the "noticing" that I do for this blog I have spent very little time thinking about diet, exercise, weight or body image. I feel like right now I'm pretty close to normal and I have complete trust.

So why the warning? Well one thing I'm noticing is how emotional I am. Resentments are near the surface and I'm ready to burst into flames at a moments notice. I'm an emotional eater. Now that I don't have my crutch, cookies, suddenly I have to actually deal with my emotions and I have no practice. I feel a little bad because I've definitely been less patient lately and my family has born the brunt of it. I'm sure I am not doing any long term damage but they have to be noticing.

The remedy is simple. Now I have to learn to deal with my emotions instead of burying them. I have to be careful not to find another unhealthy crutch. This time is very familiar, it reminds me of how I felt when I quit smoking many years ago. Suddenly I was a different person. Cookies fixed it that time but it was an unhealthy fix.

I've been meditating and noticing and I'll likely get a second hypnosis CD to help deal with the stress of life a little differently. I also plan to continue with the yoga practice I have begun. There can only be good benefits from that.

All in all, so far, this is a positive experience. I still can't tell you what the hypnosis download actually says. I never remember. No matter how much I try I drift off, even sitting up. And I wake up at the end. Maybe that's a normal part of the practice. Meanwhile if you decide to go forward with something like this keep in mind that you may need to adjust your emotions accordingly and learn new ways to cope beyond the Ben and Gerry's.

Affirmation: Today I go forward with trust that the path I've chosen is a good and positive one. All the signs point that way.

Namaste

My inlaws have left. They are not terrible people but having extra people in the house is stressful. My mother in law is a television fanatic and it drones on constantly throughout the day. Because she's in the living room(although I set up a television in the room they stayed in) the kids are upstairs. That means I have to follow or they will destroy the upper floor of the house. They cannot be alone up there, they are too young and unpredictable. This makes my life very difficult during their visit. But yesterday they left. And I spent last night tidying and cleaning up my very destroyed house, and tomorrow, as is my regular Sunday morning routine, I enjoyed my morning Coronation Street reruns and good coffee and things feel normal and good.

Hypnosis is an interesting phenomenon. As I mentioned before I've started listening to a hypnosis MP3 download. The instructions look for signs that the suggestions are working and so far I can see that there are two. I'm making the assumption that they are the result of the suggestions in the recording because I actually fall asleep(I think) at pretty much the same point in the recording every time. I listen in bed with the intention of not falling asleep. I wonder if I actually fall asleep because I do wake up long enough to take my iPod earplugs out of my ears and put it on the nightstand. If nothing else I am getting great sleep and that can't hurt my success for sure.

Back to signs. Well I'm thirsty all the time, and I know that the suggestion in is in there to drink water. When I say I'm thirsty all the time, I mean my mouth is physically dry and water is the only thing that relieves that. I usually drink the occasional Dasani vitamin water drink but they taste suddenly over-sweet and it's at the point that I have to take water to bed to drink because I wake sometimes at night thirsty. I also think about water frequently during the day. You know those cravings you get, that overwhelming urge to empty the cookie jar because it's there? Well transfer that compulsion to water and you have what this feels like. I'm going with it and celebrating it! This is very positive and the multiple trips to the bathroom is becoming a part of my daily physical activity.

The second, obvious sign is a desire to do something physically active every day. This suggestion must be in there(but I can't say for sure because I don't remember) but I know I have been busy, driving kids, in laws visiting, cooking etc. and I've become very agitated by the fact that I am not getting out to walk every day and I'm particularly missing my yoga which was cancelled for Easter. Today the sun is shining and I'm taking the kids on a hike. Again, this isn't regular desire, but a craving that is unfamiliar to me. I love to walk but this overwhelming desire to do it is new.

I wonder if these suggestions have taken because I'm inclined to do these things anyway. I do like to walk and I like water, I just lose momentum, don't make them a priority, fall out of the habit. I'm hoping that the habits will be more steadfast now.

No matter what though, both these cravings are positive and I'm just going with them.

I am still eating a little more often than I would like and I'm wondering if a custom recording that addresses my specific eating issues would be more beneficial. I seem to be highly suggestible, maybe because I'm highly open to the process, so I think, long-term, this will be a valuable tool for me.

And I must mention as well, my pants are looser and my rings are rolling around on my fingers. I'm not hungry unless I'm physically hungry, there has been no binging, the cookie jar is full, the bread drawer hasn't been raided and today I'm making healthy food that involves spinach and pasta. I also wonder if not having a house full of people will be of help, hypnotherapy aside. I cook differently for company and that carries over.

Affirmation: I am confident that all of the tools I've chosen to use on this journey will bring positive and lasting results as I work towards wellness and well being.

Hypnosis is a very well established form of therapy for a variety of things. As I said yesterday I downloaded an Mp3 from Hypnotransformations(store link in my sidebar) and have started using it. I have not actually listened to the entire download however. I keep falling asleep. According to the instructions that came with it that's OK because the subconscious is always listening and well, I believe that to be true.

So yesterday it was sunny. I thought I would "listen" rather than try to "practice" so I went outside and laid on my back porch swing with my iPod as my daughter played around. I'm not sure what happened but I was very relaxed. The beginning of the cd was so relaxing I assume I fell asleep. Good thing my mother in law was here to watch the kids! I woke up feeling absolutely wonderful but I have no memory of any suggestions with regard to weight loss etc. Just incredible relaxation along the lines of a guided meditation. About 20 minutes after I woke up I suddenly was overcome with an incredible thirst, a dry mouth and I drank a lot of water.

Last night I decided to try it in bed with no interruptions. I did hear some of the suggestions regarding food and lo and behold one that suggested that I would be thirsty when I finished the hypnosis. So that explainss why I was so thirsty the first time! That suggestion must have taken!

I am optimistic that this will be a great tool for me to use along this journey. I'm excited to keep doing this twice a week at least and the instructions add that you can do it more if you wish. I think I'll do more.

So, about strawberries. For years I ate strawberries. I love them. Then in my early thirties every time I ate them I got hives. It was crazy. The more I ate, the more I got. So I stopped eating them although occasionally I'd have a sample and I'd get hives again. In the past two or three years though suddenly they didn't' have any affect on me, I could eat them again. So I did and no hives. Yay! Then this spring, once again the strawberries are causing me to have hives. Last night I had strawberries with frozen yogurt for dessert and yep, bumps on my legs.

So no more strawberries although I may try some from the local U-pick to see if that might make a difference. I'm wondering if the local strawberries are different and OK for me.

If not I'll miss them. I really like strawberries.

Affirmation: I am on a good path. The signs are all around me that this is the way I should go. I will continue positively on this journey to wellness and well being.

In researching the non-diet methods of coming to a positive relationship with food I've come across two methods which seem to be effective in reprogramming the subconscious thoughts that lead to failure within diet. The two methods, both of which have been mentioned as valuable tools by Dr. Bruce Lipton in his book The Biology of Belief are EFT and Hypnosis. I've signed up for a newsletter to learn more about EFT but I thought I would try hypnosis first since it's a familiar methodology.

I started looking for hypnotherapists and found that they were very expensive. I've searched the Internet and I've asked friends. I hadn't made a decision on which cd to buy when someone commented on my blog here yesterday and yes, of course, she had a hypnosis blog and an etsy store where she sold her own Cd's and even better for me mp3 downloads! My iPod is my best friend so I immediately ordered a download from her.

Her voice on the mp3 is wonderfully soothing and I cannot wait to listen to it and use it the way it's meant to be used.

I've added a link to the store on my sidebar. I do not get any profit from this store I just wanted people who are on this journey to have access to as many tools as possible!

Affirmation: I will use all the tools available to continue to know that I can have a healthy and fit life and a healthy relationship with food.

Last night I ate Cheetos. I didn't count, I didn't plan, I just ate them. They were good. No guilt today but a long walk for balance and because the sun is shining finally!

I love junk food. It tastes good. It feels good to eat it and I do get the "munchies" on occasion. I'm going to indulge in that sometimes. I think it's about balance. There is no bad, no good, just balance.

I have been sleeping so well lately. I'm drinking a "bedtime" tea and it's been fantastic. And the more sleep I get the better I deal with life and use other tools rather than food to cope.

Have I mentioned my in laws are here? Yes. And they brought blueberry pie into my home. So I ate some. With wine. So what? It was good. I'll live. Remember, I'm not on a diet!

I'm getting better at being less obsessive and angry about the temptations and the people who jeopardise what I try to do. I'm the one who chose to eat or not eat the blueberry pie. I keep the sweets to a minimum in the house for the simple reason that they are not super-healthy but they are super-delicious so I am not going to beat myself up over eating some of it.

Affirmation: First the balance, then the success. Maybe the balance is the success! Sorting this out is what will lead to a normal attitude about food and reprogram the thoughts I've taken as truths in the past.

In case you were wondering, you can do this. There is no doubt that we all can overcome this disordered thinking we have with regard to the food we eat. We can stop obsessing about whether we should do this or that or whether we should eat this or that. There is no bad or good, no right or wrong there is just a disordered way of thinking that has taken control of our subconscious but now that we know we can fix it.

So if you've had a bad day and you are starting to doubt that you can do this think again! You can do this. Others have and you can do. You are as deserving of health and well-being as the next person! You have decided to try to achieve it and you will if you continue to know, deep down inside know, that you will do it. It's not belief, it's not a maybe it's a knowing! You KNOW you can so you will!

Tonight when you go to bed instead of reliving the mistakes of the day think of the positives, the things that prove that you are able to do whatever you set your mind to. Grasp the vision in your mind and hold on to it and then simultaneously work on living in the journey and enjoying the moments that lead you to the vision. Feel how it will feel when you are at your vision so live in that feeling along the journey.

Affirmation: I feel the happiness of success, I feel how it feels to have my vision, I feel confident and well and happy and I am there in my heart and this guides me along the path to success

Namaste

Stuffed! I bet that's how most of us ended yesterday. I did and then spent the better part of the evening wondering why? Why did I, after all my affirmations and and promises to myself not to, do this yet again?

One thing I concluded was that the reason I overate my dinner was that it snuck up on me, suddenly I was stuffed! Then I continued to eat because I've been programmed to clean my plate and I justified it with the idea that because I only had vegetables, steamed and cooked fresh that it was ok. Then because it was Easter I had the special treats, a chocolate egg, two glasses of wine, the usual.

After much deliberation I realised something. This is normal behaviour. It's not something that should be done regularly but occasionally, on special occasions, even the skinny overeat. Why should the large not get to partake of the same amounts of food and wine simply because they metabolize it differently? Why should I feel guilty?

So I decided not to. There are times to celebrate with wine and food and let go of the guilt associations served unfairly to us by the diet industry and a society of people who think this is our fault, that we're this way because we've failed when it's the diet industry, the fashion industry and a fat-phobic society that have led us to his unhealthy obsession with food and the subsequent consequences of it.

So today, a low-sugar day for me, so that I can strike a balance between enjoying the food I eat and watching the nutrition I consume so as to attain optimum health
and wellness, I will let go of yesterday, take the lesson learned and add it to my arsenol of weapons against the programming of my subconscious!

Affirmation: I have a healthy attitude towards food, knowing that occasional indulgences are normal and I am able to strike a balance as I am guided towards a healthy relationship with food.

Sugar consumption in North America and most of the western world is out of control. I'm not anti-sugar, in fact from the way I've consumed it in the past you'd likely say I'm pro-sugar. I am though, trying to cut the white stuff out of my diet.

It's difficult. I was going to have a no-sugar day today, on the premise that if I take it one day at a time as they do in recovery movement I would significantly reduce the amount of sugar I consume. Then I realised that the only breakfast food I have in the house is cereal, third ingredient sugar. Sigh.

I don't plan of completely giving up sugar, I feel that blanket-stating that you are giving up anything leads to a feeling of deprivation however I do want to make a conscious effort to decrease my consumption for health reasons. So I will start with no sugar days, one day at a time and not sweat the occasional low-sugar days that come around.

Today is Easter Sunday. There are chocolate foil-wrapped eggs hiding all over our house left by a mythical bunny last night. I ate one and it wasn't that great. That's it though, they do not call to me as they once would have and I'll leave them to little girls to devour over the next month or so.

Meanwhile it's good to know there is no sugar addiction, just my own mind telling me that I'm addicted when in reality, by retraining my subconscious it turns out I'm not. I just held the belief that I was. Now that I am shedding all of those old beliefs like a worn, shabby old coat, I'm finding that the cravings are fading as well.

Affirmation of the day: I know longer feel the need for sugary food and drink. I've discovered the sweetness of a life with the feeling of well being that comes from a healthy diet. I will be always be well. I will always feel well.

Namaste

Trust is vital to this process. When you have been doing things one way for a long time, the habits are so strongly ingrained into your subconscious it becomes difficult to believe that a new, different way will work although there is ample proof the old way didn't work.

I think this is where a lot of people give up. I think it is at this point, when we lose trust that we'll slim down naturally by being mindful and reprogramming the messages we've spent a lifetime being filled up with.

So today I've spent time thinking and giving myself over completely in trust to the process that I feel will likely lead to my ultimate success. I will lose weight, it will fall off of me at a natural and healthy rate and stop when I reach the weight that is optimal for my well being and happiness.

I don't know what that size is. I imagine it's a few months away yet. I no longer measure in pounds but in successful moments of irradicating old, useless information and filling up my mind with the new, valid information that will lead to my transformation.

Trust is the most important ingredient in this recipe for success. Cultivate it by assuring yourself that you have the ability within you to change your attitudes, your beliefs and your habits so that they are aligned with your future picture of yourself.

Namaste

One thing that isn't a fallacy is the fact that we should be moving more. As time goes on it is amazing how little we move in our daily lives. The work we have is stationary, the entertainment consists of a little box where images are fed to us or that other little box where our fingers and wrists are the only parts of us that get a workout.

Today I walked. I have a double walking stroller and I filled it with nearly a hundred pounds of kid-weight and walked. We toured from one end of our small town to the other and it felt good. The sun is finally shining and it appears it will for a while finally. So I am on the move!

You have to turn of the television. I am not a television person and I do believe that the messages we receive through the ads combined with how it interferes with our desire to move and the time we have available to us to move is a great deterrent to physical activity in our lives.

We do not need to run maratho, though that is possible for most of us with training, we just need to move. Get a good pair of sneakers and walk. Take your camera and your dog. Blog about it. Listen to books on tape or music on your iPod. Push those strollers.

In all of the old English novels everybody walked daily for exercise. It was routine. Make it routine again. Fancy is not required, just get out and walk at a nice pace for an hour. Make it a priority. Make it fun. Make it happen!

A pair of sneakers and a road. That is all you need. Pretend you are an English lady strolling the countryside. Who knows, maybe there is a dashing Mr. Darcy in the stylings of a Jane Austen novel out there who just laced up his walking shoes after reading the brilliance that is the weighlessandweightless blog! One can always dream!

So get out there and move it! It is easy, requires no special skills and is free! Say hey to Mr. Darcy for me!

It's amazing. I can make a double batch of chocolate chip cookies and not eat any of the dough and only have 2 cookies with a cup of tea. Do you know there were cookies in my cookie jar for a week and I didn't eat them. I gave them to my daughters yesterday! I usually taste a little of the batter and get on with making them. I just can't be bothered.

Of course the above is an affirmation because today I am baking a double batch of chocolate chip cookies and I used to eat more cookie dough than cookies. I don't do that anymore. I decided not to identify that as part of my thought system anymore and so that's my affirmation. Although the part about the cookie jar is true. I just couldn't be bothered! I think it's important to add proof to the affirmations.

Willpower is a fascinating thing. Someone posted that they didn't have any with regards to food and I'm wondering do we have to have it? The diet industry has sold us, and we have bought into the idea that if we "fail" on a diet it's not the diet's fault or the industry's fault, it's ours because we don't have enough willpower thus deepening the message that there is something wrong with us. There isn't anything wrong with us, we are fine, we've just been programmed wrong.

And I don't buy it anymore. I just don't eat everything in sight anymore, it's not will power, it's the opposite, it's letting go, it's getting in the flow and not worrying about how it will end but just reprogramming my mind along the journey.

Today I walk. It's a sunny day and I'm getting outside and just walking and being alive in the sunshine. I will make the cookies first. I will post them in the recipes if they turn out, it's my sister's recipe and it's very yummy!

Meme: I have no will power.
Truth: I don't need will power, I no longer require will power because my thoughts are now in line with health and wellness and a positive attitude towards food.

Have a happy and satisfying day!

It's not your mother's fault you're fat. Nor is it anyone else's. We've all been set up for this with the same messages from a variety of sources, we've been conditioned to believe we're going to gain weight if we do this or don't do that and we believe them. They've been sown like seeds into our subconscious mind but everything in our culture, even the things that should be helpful such as the diet industry contains a blatant missing property, personal responsibility. They've convinced us we need them to do this.

In recent years a common statement I've heard is "you can't change others, you can only work on changing yourself". I think you can inspire others to change but beyond that I believe this statement is true. And because of that then it follows that only you can make you healthy and well and fit. This is your subconscious and let's face it, the culture and environment you are in aren't going to suddenly change all the messages it's been throwing at you for the past 50 years.

The diet industry can't afford for you to lose weight, for the masses to suddenly discover how to do this by itself so it's not motivated to change.

Your family have received the same messages you have, most of us were raised by parents who were raised by parents who grew up in the great depression and the their truth was eat while you can, eat everything, don't waste food because then it was the truth that it might be your last meal.

Now this is no longer true but the messages remain although they are invalid. Today I threw out a bunch of leftovers. This goes against everything that I've ever been taught. I've eaten the same dinner three days in a row and then let the rest spoil before throwing it out, the belief that wasting food is a terrible thing is so deeply ingrained in my subconscious.

My meme of the day is "don't throw food out, it's wasteful". And I'm changing it to "I always throw food out, because it's very wasteful to put food in a body that's already well nourished". I have no guilt over throwing out food I was sick of eating. I have no guilt over anything about food anymore, those associations have to go.

I'm also taking it easy on the kids. I've already changed the way I speak about food, there is no waste as long as everybody eats until they are satisfied(not stuffed) and then we clean up. I'm hoping to give them a head start that I never got.

I have started using affirmations but usually nothing set, just letting them come. But I thought I would write a simple positive thought affirmation for you, my readers, similar to what I repeat to my self daily and at night.

I am happy. I am healthy. I have a healthy body. I have a healthy attitude towards food. I no longer crave food. I eat want I want, when I want and it is right. I drink what I want when I want and it is right. I usually only want good nourishing food. I feel happy, I feel healthy, my body feels healthy!
Then I bask in the feeling of the truths I am telling myself. I FEEL the information soaking in. I don't work at it, I allow it. I let it wash over me and feel joy. When I feel that joy, I sit in that space until I fall asleep.

Don't memorize the affirmation above, it is true only for me. Compose your own or better yet just let it come every night. I find it helps to start with a set affirmation but then add on what is relevant in the moment.

As an aside, my clothes are looser, I feel fantastic and I know this will work. That is an affirmation in and of itself!

Change your thoughts, change your waist size. How? Talk yourself into it! In the last post I talked about deprogramming and reprogramming all of the messages that have gotten into your subconscious mind over the course of your life time. I've started to use the last few minutes before falling asleep to affirm the truths that I now claim as my own in order to cast out the old beliefs of my subconscious and replace them with healthy beliefs, positive truths.

But another thing I've started doing is being aware of the thoughts that come into and out of my mind all day and casting them out and replacing them with new positive thoughts. If I were saying what I was thinking out loud I would be typing this from a secure facility somewhere. Thoughts like "I eat small meals, I always have a little glass of water beside me, I never crave food, I only eat for nourishment, I don't think about food that often". These are the thoughts that I'm consciously trying to encode into my subconscious.

I am considering learning some self-hypnosis techniques. I've heard that this can be a handy tool, putting yourself in a highly suggestive state while repeating the new codes you have to put into your brain.

I'm realistic. I know I will have to practice this, a lot, it's all new and it's all experimental but I know right now I'm starting to believe the new truths consciously. I'm hoping this experiment will mean I will start to believe in subconsciously since that's what controls 95% of what we do in our lives.

So start talking yourself into it. Quietly of course. A simple thing but something I think you have to do in order to succeed with weight loss. Change your mind, change your waist size!

In the work of Bruce Lipton, PhD. he speaks of the two states of consciousness, the conscious mind and the subconscious mind. He differentiates them this way. The conscious mind is what we are aware of, the subconscious mind is all the programming we've received over our lifetime on every topic we've ever been exposed to.

Dr. Wayne Dyer PhD. speaks of memes which are thoughts we have, often that we are unaware of, that have been placed in our minds by others, our families, our friends, our culture, the world around us. A meme is something that many of us accept as truth but under further scrutiny it doesn't hold up as truth.

An example of a weight loss meme would be "I need to drink 6-8 glasses of water a day to lose weight". I know every program I've been on to lose weight insisted this was absolutely vital and necessary.

I do agree with one thing, water is important, in fact it's vital for life. However we've made it into a should and shoulds don't hold up under scrutiny. Once we forget or don't drink our water the thought follows "we won't lose weight now". and then we slip into "well we've messed this up". So is it actually true? No, I've lost weight without drinking that much water or even keeping track of my water. What is true is only that water is vital to life. Living creatures cannot live without water. And we've gotten so far removed from our instincts and so programmed for sugar and flavour I've heard people say they don't like the way water tastes. I wonder if a week without water in a dessert would fix their taste for water. But that's a topic for another day.

So I've decided to let go of that meme. I just don't believe it. I'm drinking water daily, with some nice teas, and I fully expect that's a healthy thing to do. I expect to lose weight over time but not because I drank a requisite amount of water but because I just expect that all these healthy habits and deprogramming will allow me to do so.

So, onward I go, recording any thought that I think has been fed to me and holding it up to scrutiny.

The questions I ask of these thoughts are

1. Is this actually true?
2. Is the opposite also possible?
3. Who told me this?
4. And what would I do if this thought weren't possible?

Seek out your memes and debunk them, then reprogram yourself with the opposite thoughts, the truth that is yours, not the one that's been fed you.

So we have a new template. I hope you like it. It really suits me and matches my other blog as well with the colour. It will likely undergo some tweaking over the next while but I really like it.

So let's get on with it shall we?

I've given this a lot of thought and here is what I've come up with. This is radical. Are you sitting down?

Ok..so here is the question. What if everything we've ever been programmed to think about weightloss is wrong? What if the thoughts, the messages we've recieved our entire lives is the problem. What if we just simply need to change our thoughts in order to be successful.

Yesterday I wrote down ten common thoughts that I am aware of that I've always believed to be true. Now I'm working on debunking them. I've thought of a few more.

1. Oh, you weigh more, maybe you've gained muscle rather than fat
2. It's water weight
3. You will go into starvation mode and hold on to weight
4. It's harder to lose weight after 20, 30, 40, 50
5. You should weigh every day to keep on top of things
6. You should only weigh once a week.


ok..these are some I've had since yesterday

1. Maybe, maybe not. Stop using the scale and use your waist size instead.
2. Maybe, maybe not. Stop using the scale and use your waist size instead.
3. Really? Is there really such a thing? Because I've seen World Vision and I'm not seeing this. Starving people are thin.
4. Really or is that just an excuse we use, something we've heard, believed and accedpted as true.
5. Really? How about just allowing things to happen
6. Really? How about just allowing things to happen

I'm in utter doubt that anything I've believed all my life about food, diet, weight etc. are true.

Now. What to do with this information.

Step One: First of all I spend 5 minutes in bed every night debunking every weightloss thought that comes to me. It's easy to lose weight after forty, I never crave carbs, I won't go into starvation mode, I trust my body to slip to the weight, I will eat what I feel is good for me and that I need in smaller amounts because I never eat large meals, I only eat small meals.

Step Two: I spend 5 minutes in bed everynight feeling how good it feels knowing that all of this is true, that it's all been lies and now I know the truth and I feel so good knowing that my optimum weight, fitness level and wellness is within my reach finally.

Step Three: I fall asleep in this knowing and marinate in the positivity the entire night

Step Four: Spread the word.

If you are currently following a weightloss plan don't stop. Add this to it instead. Follow your intuition and trust the truth you know is yours.

Take care of You!

I've taken some time to do some research and explore the diet industry and familiarize myself with what's out there trying to crack the code, the mystery of why it's so hard, so very difficult for human beings to lose weight and keep it off. I've come up with some interesting hypothesis and I've decided to test them out on myself.

First of all, why, if the diet industry is a multi billion dollar industry, why doesn't it work? I have an answer. If it worked, there wouldn't be a multi billion dollar diet industry. There is no incentive for anyone who sells or promotes weight loss to have people keep the weight off so the answer cannot, does not lie in the diet industry.

So what's left? The medical industry? Nope, because they'll likely tell you that you should go on a diet. Try Jenny Craig, try Weight Watchers, try whatever works for you. Except, nothing works.

So is that it? Are we doomed? Is this such a difficult thing that it's very rare that anyone ever succeeds?

I think, that's what they want us to think. I think there is an answer but it's not out there anywhere, it's inside of us, everyone of us, if we let go of all the thoughts that prevent us from succeeding.

I'm going to give you some examples of thoughts I have that have defeated me in the past.

1. I can't give up sugar, I'd feel deprived
2. I have to give up sugar, I'm addicted to it
3. I always have cravings for carbs after dinner
4. I always have cravings for carbs before my period
5. I always lose traction on any diet around the 6 week mark.
6. Only 5% lose it all and keep it off, surely the odds are against me
7. My family is obese
8. I need to eat large amounts of highly nutritious food
9. I have to write everything down to lose weight
10. I have to workout every day for 1 hour to lose weight.

So one by one I'm debunking these thoughts for myself.

I've come up with a counter thought to undo the negative thought.

1. I can give up sugar.
2. I don't have to give up sugar to lose weight, but I can if I want to \
3. I don't have cravings for carbs after dinner anymore
4. I never have cravings for carbs before my period anymore
5. I never lose traction maintaining a healthy diet and lifestyle
6. Says who? The diet industry, the medical profession? Billions of dollars and they still can't get us to lose weight and keep it off, their credibility is shot.
7. I'm not my family, I am me.
8. I need to eat nutritious food until I'm comfortably full and satisfied. Large portions are not necessary
9. I can write down whatever I want to or not write anything down
10. It is good to take part in activity that satisfies my soul and strengthens my body.

So those are just 10 thoughts that flit in and out of my mind that are negative. Some are my own doubts but some are planted by the diet industry itself in an attempt to lure me in to buying this or that product.

I've no problem with programs like Weight Watchers or other organisations as long as we understand that we may encounter validations of the negative thoughts that hold us back from truly succeeding.

If you believe you will be successful you will be successful. So now, I challenge you, come up with ten thoughts of your own that you believe must happen in order for you to be successful and then put a positive spin on them or debunct them if you can, particularly if they are defeating you.

I'm my own guinea pig here and I'll be working on changing the thoughts in my head that have held me back. We'll see how it goes. I want to be here two years from now, healthier and fitter than ever and I don't think my answer is out there, I think I have the answers for me right here inside my head and yours are inside you. You just have to turn them around, debunct those that can be proven to be untrue and move forward.

In the next post I'm going to go further into actual practical tools to make this work for you. Have your list ready.

Ok...so this template just isn't working right and doesn't appear properly on the page so we've found a new one and hopefully I can get that to work and get back to writing and telling you about my new, wonderful and radical ideas about weight loss. I'm looking for a new name as well so you may see several different names before I settle.

Thank you for you patience. I promise it'll be worth the wait!

So I haven't been writing as much because I've been busy setting up the new template on the blog. It's been a bit of a battle and if you have Internet Explorer 7.0 you might see it looking a bit funny on your screen. It's ok on mine, looks great on earlier versions of explorer and is ok on other internet navigation programs.

I'm trying to remain optimistic that the track I"m on is the right one. I did Yoga on Monday night and she really put me through my paces. I only broke a slight sweat but I've been feeling slight indications in my shoulders and leg muscles that it's a lot more strenous than it seems while you are doing it. My goal is to learn enough to make it a practice on a daily basis although as of yet I've not done anything at home. I have a nice series of Sun Salutations I could be doing in the morning yet somehow my days don't have a nice rhythm or routine to them right now and I keep forgetting.

Space. I think it's very important to have space to do the things you need to do. We have a huge basement area that hasn't been set up for use yet. My husband is currently fixing a Futon that's down there and when my father in law comes next week I hope he makes the space into one we can use more regularly. It's not finished but it's perfect for kids. Then I'm clearing out my living room and reclaiming it for me! A place to do Yoga in the morning. Perfect!

Today the plan is to try a new recipe. It's an eggplant Lasagna with tofu and lots of veggies. I'll post pictures if it turns out well! I'm looking forward to a nice healthy dinner with a large salad however I am having great difficulty locatind decent lettuce. I cannot wait for the summer veggies to be here! Fresh produce, what a wonderful gift!

Have a wonderful, peaceful day and stay in the flow of wellness and well-being. Nourish you body, your mind and your spirit. Move gently, love life and be well.

Namaste